Are You Being Selfish Enough?

Are You Being Selfish Enough?

“Caring supremely or unduly for one’s self; regarding one’s own comfort, advantage, in disregard, or at the expense, of those of others.” No wonder we don’t want to be considered selfish. And yet I have clients who make the question, “Am I being selfish?” the key factor in making important life decisions. When they think […]

9 Ways You’re Already Mentally Tough

9 Ways You’re Already Mentally Tough

As you know, I think a lot about “mental toughness” and how we can train ourselves to have more of it. But I also think we can get so caught up noticing the times we aren’t mentally tough that we overlook or discount the instances when we are.  Mental toughness doesn’t have to be reserved for some high-stakes situation […]

How I’m Breaking My Emotional Addiction

How I’m Breaking My Emotional Addiction

Standing at the crowded coffee bar, I waited patiently to catch the attention of the server frantically busy filling orders. A tall German woman strode up next to me and, with no hesitation, called out her order for two cappuccinos. I looked at her, incredulous, feeling the urge to slap her arm and say: “Are […]

Are You Afraid To Go All Out?

Are You Afraid To Go All Out?

In one of the more heart-wrenching stories from the Rio Olympics, US cyclist Mara Abbott was one of two leading the pack in the women’s cycling race as they climbed the steep 19% incline. Racing down the descent, the other cyclist crashed and Mara was alone in the lead — until, 200 meters from the finish line (and a gold medal), […]

The Time I Got Busted Not Paying Attention

The Time I Got Busted Not Paying Attention

On Saturday afternoons, I take one of my favorite class workouts, Forza, based on samurai sword fighting, with martial arts fitness instructor Ilaria Montagnani. After the warm-up and technical exercises, we learn two combinations, each a series of 16 moves – half cuts, diagonals, horizontals, for example – combined with squats and specific footwork moving […]

Are You Leveraging the Power of Curiosity?

Are You Leveraging the Power of Curiosity?

My dad likes to tell this story from my childhood: I was three years old, we were eating dinner and my mom chastised me for chewing with my mouth open, saying “That’s how pigs eat.” My immediate response: “Do cows do it too?” Apparently, I’ve always been curious about behavior, bovine and otherwise.  Over the years, […]

The Four-Letter Word Slowing Down Your Success

The Four-Letter Word Slowing Down Your Success

We say it all the time: “This is hard.” “This sucks.” “I hate this.” “This.” Sounds innocuous. But using it as a vague catch-all when we’re under emotional duress keeps us feeling helpless and out of control. It mires us in a place of “all or nothing,” where we lose our perspective, judge everything about a situation […]